








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 205 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 59 matches | ||
| Premier | 44 matches | ||
| Wingman | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2653 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,238 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2290 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1731 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 2357 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1860 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $766,594 of utility $149 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 149 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | El Don | 58% | 26 |
| #4 | zldeniz | 57% | 51 |
| #5 | NIVEL🦋 | 56% | 109 |
| #6 | Uncle Smooth | 51% | 55 |
| #7 | MASERATI ROWDY | 48% | 77 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MASERATI ROWDY | 4 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | NIVEL🦋 | 2 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | Uncle Smooth | 2 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | zldeniz | 1 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zldeniz | 106 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #2 | NIVEL🦋 | 91 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| #3 | Uncle Smooth | 68 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #4 | MASERATI ROWDY | 66 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #5 | El Don | 66 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NIVEL🦋 | +4.19 | 82 | 62 |
| #2 | Mo0Zze | +1.76 | 74 | 67 |
| #3 | zldeniz | -0.01 | 67 | 44 |
| #4 | El Don | -1.52 | 46 | 58 |
| #5 | MASERATI ROWDY | -1.90 | 64 | 34 |





