








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1640 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 241 matches | ||
| Faceit | 75 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




71 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6432 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,827 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3214 | 25% |
| Smokes | 2599 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 3147 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 3867 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,328,646 of utility $138 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 875 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Soletkov | 63% | 56 |
| #2 | bLz⌖ | 59% | 143 |
| #3 | glazz | 58% | 62 |
| #4 | 老师 | 58% | 78 |
| #5 | BOMBICHKAA | 58% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | krypton | 57% | 90 |
| #7 | Johnny Sins | 56% | 112 |
| #8 | ☣Kiko☣ | 52% | 31 |
| #9 | wollz | 47% | 60 |
| #10 | TotiMaster3 | 41% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Johnny Sins | 15 | 0.0067 |
| #2 | 老师 | 11 | 0.0074 |
| #3 | bLz⌖ | 9 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | Soletkov | 8 | 0.0067 |
| #5 | krypton | 7 | 0.0038 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | krypton | 399 | 0.22 | 9 min |
| #2 | Johnny Sins | 377 | 0.17 | 8 min |
| #3 | bLz⌖ | 314 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #4 | 老师 | 282 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| #5 | TotiMaster3 | 278 | 0.27 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | L | +3.50 | 80 | 54 |
| #2 | BOMBICHKAA | +3.06 | 90 | 65 |
| #3 | Soletkov | +1.75 | 81 | 64 |
| #4 | 老师 | +1.16 | 82 | 59 |
| #5 | wollz | +0.82 | 89 | 54 |





