








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 564 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 398 matches | ||
| Faceit | 32 matches | ||
| Wingman | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




78 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4672 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,464 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2445 | 21% |
| Smokes | 3399 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 4554 | 40% |
| Molotovs | 1066 | 9% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,235,417 of utility $278 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1676 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sperm Whale | 50% | 345 |
| #2 | σ ³β§β§Χ¨CLIVEΧ§ | 48% | 46 |
| #3 | Aimbotabuser | 47% | 388 |
| #4 | Miyamoto musashi | 45% | 98 |
| #5 | βͺ ππΏπ²π²π²π²π² | 39% | 49 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sperm Whale | 50% | 345 |
| #2 | σ ³β§β§Χ¨CLIVEΧ§ | 48% | 46 |
| #3 | Aimbotabuser | 47% | 388 |
| #4 | Miyamoto musashi | 45% | 98 |
| #5 | βͺ ππΏπ²π²π²π²π² | 39% | 49 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Aimbotabuser | 49 | 0.0059 |
| #2 | Miyamoto musashi | 42 | 0.0199 |
| #3 | Sperm Whale | 24 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | βͺ ππΏπ²π²π²π²π² | 10 | 0.0096 |
| #5 | σ ³β§β§Χ¨CLIVEΧ§ | 10 | 0.0097 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Aimbotabuser | 1999 | 0.24 | 54 min |
| #2 | Sperm Whale | 860 | 0.12 | 19 min |
| #3 | Miyamoto musashi | 479 | 0.23 | 7 min |
| #4 | βͺ ππΏπ²π²π²π²π² | 152 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #5 | σ ³β§β§Χ¨CLIVEΧ§ | 120 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Aimbotabuser | +2.15 | 81 | 66 |
| #2 | Miyamoto musashi | +1.85 | 83 | 52 |
| #3 | σ ³β§β§Χ¨CLIVEΧ§ | +1.32 | 66 | 69 |
| #4 | βͺ ππΏπ²π²π²π²π² | +0.73 | 80 | 63 |
| #5 | Sperm Whale | -0.07 | 52 | 61 |





