








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 48 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 374 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 64 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4093 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,362 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2674 | 19% |
| Smokes | 3730 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 4250 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 3708 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,205,722 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 618 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lupy | 52% | 163 |
| #2 | Wieselaffe | 48% | 48 |
| #3 | Branster | 48% | 61 |
| #4 | Peterschnitte | 47% | 60 |
| #5 | Bot Alex | 46% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Wieselaffe | 48% | 48 |
| #3 | Branster | 48% | 61 |
| #4 | Peterschnitte | 47% | 60 |
| #5 | Bot Alex | 46% | 35 |
| #6 | L453R | 39% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lupy | 11 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | Branster | 4 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | Peterschnitte | 4 | 0.0034 |
| #4 | Bot Alex | 2 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | L453R | 2 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lupy | 477 | 0.14 | 11 min |
| #2 | Branster | 155 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #3 | Peterschnitte | 147 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #4 | L453R | 73 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #5 | Bot Alex | 68 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Branster | +0.96 | 82 | 67 |
| #2 | Lupy | +0.61 | 62 | 70 |
| #3 | Albus Doubledoors | +0.05 | 71 | 62 |
| #4 | Wieselaffe | -0.74 | 64 | 33 |
| #5 | Bot Alex | -1.27 | 58 | 61 |





