








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 313 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 270 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 86 matches | ||
| Faceit | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 17 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




62 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4734 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,248 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3240 | 19% |
| Smokes | 4728 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 5217 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 4063 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,574,163 of utility $146 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1876 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | v1sion | 63% | 35 |
| #2 | oskaremil | 61% | 49 |
| #3 | matisselur | 50% | 46 |
| #4 | ciggy cat | 49% | 41 |
| #5 | KaL | 40% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | v1sion | 63% | 35 |
| #2 | oskaremil | 61% | 49 |
| #3 | matisselur | 50% | 46 |
| #4 | ciggy cat | 49% | 41 |
| #5 | KaL | 40% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ciggy cat | 6 | 0.0071 |
| #2 | oskaremil | 4 | 0.0040 |
| #3 | v1sion | 1 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | KaL | 1 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ciggy cat | 173 | 0.20 | 4 min |
| #2 | v1sion | 99 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #3 | oskaremil | 79 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #4 | KaL | 33 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | matisselur | 12 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | registrert seksuell fornærmer | +1.76 | 58 | 57 |
| #2 | v1sion | +1.45 | 73 | 58 |
| #3 | ciggy cat | +0.91 | 88 | 65 |
| #4 | oskaremil | +0.73 | 59 | 62 |
| #5 | matisselur | -2.85 | 46 | 27 |





