








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 29 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 49 matches | ||
| Faceit | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
586 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,684 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 657 | 24% |
| Smokes | 466 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 895 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 666 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $213,748 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | autism terminal | 100% | 10 |
| #2 | Wallheck | 70% | 30 |
| #3 | satakieli | 55% | 38 |
| #4 | edi | 55% | 42 |
| #5 | vay | 51% | 80 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Wallheck | 70% | 30 |
| #3 | satakieli | 55% | 38 |
| #4 | edi | 55% | 42 |
| #5 | vay | 51% | 80 |
| #6 | leka | 40% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | edi | 2 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | vay | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #3 | satakieli | 1 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | autism terminal | 1 | 0.0046 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | satakieli | 87 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #2 | Wallheck | 79 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #3 | edi | 52 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #4 | vay | 38 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #5 | leka | 27 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | autism terminal | +5.11 | 87 | 77 |
| #2 | satakieli | +2.66 | 76 | 68 |
| #3 | Wallheck | +2.41 | 89 | 67 |
| #4 | vay | +1.92 | 83 | 36 |
| #5 | edi | -0.83 | 45 | 62 |





