








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1348 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 712 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 143 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5162 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 41,334 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10504 | 25% |
| Smokes | 9795 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 10795 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 10240 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,210,457 of utility $131 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 271 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Syrus | 50% | 138 |
| #2 | ph1pp | 48% | 42 |
| #3 | nIcO.de | 47% | 95 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Syrus | 50% | 138 |
| #2 | ph1pp | 48% | 42 |
| #3 | nIcO.de | 47% | 95 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Syrus | 1 | 0.0003 |
| #2 | nIcO.de | 1 | 0.0005 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Syrus | 573 | 0.19 | 15 min |
| #2 | nIcO.de | 195 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #3 | ph1pp | 107 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Syrus | +3.08 | 76 | 69 |
| #2 | nIcO.de | +0.23 | 59 | 61 |
| #3 | Beauty Hans | -0.68 | 47 | 73 |
| #4 | ph1pp | -1.42 | 55 | 62 |





