








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 42 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 36 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
712 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,469 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 986 | 40% |
| Smokes | 603 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 370 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 510 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $105,163 of utility $86 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 12 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DOYA | 78% | 9 |
| #2 | frky | 75% | 4 |
| #3 | dav | 75% | 12 |
| #4 | .Antimate | 71% | 24 |
| #5 | montevonzot | 67% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | .Antimate | 3 | 0.0059 |
| #2 | malgucken | 2 | 0.0345 |
| #3 | san | 1 | 0.0038 |
| #4 | DOYA | 1 | 0.0052 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kochvan | +7.01 | 72 | 65 |
| #2 | bilbo.- | +5.08 | 86 | 68 |
| #3 | J0N1 | +2.56 | 95 | 63 |
| #4 | Jeff | +2.33 | 68 | 74 |
| #5 | frky | +1.95 | 74 | 77 |





