








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 161 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 90 matches | ||
| Wingman | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2505 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,804 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2915 | 37% |
| Smokes | 1881 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1373 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 1635 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $568,678 of utility $109 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 20 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MatthewCZ | 57% | 56 |
| #2 | Atomikk18 | 54% | 167 |
| #3 | ⭕⃤ Адам<3 | 49% | 118 |
| #4 | Ondra32 | 49% | 94 |
| #5 | WolfFíla | 47% | 77 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⭕⃤ Адам<3 | 902 | 0.40 | 16 min |
| #2 | Atomikk18 | 321 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #3 | Ondra32 | 120 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #4 | WolfFíla | 96 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #5 | MatthewCZ | 52 | 0.05 | 1 min |





