








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1898 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 914 matches | ||
| Premier | 116 matches | ||
| Wingman | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 45 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




42 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8573 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 44,525 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9500 | 21% |
| Smokes | 12081 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 13077 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 9867 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,325,128 of utility $137 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 4993 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gp | 65% | 63 |
| #2 | Titan | 59% | 109 |
| #3 | FEE | 56% | 109 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gp | 65% | 63 |
| #2 | Titan | 59% | 109 |
| #3 | FEE | 56% | 109 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FEE | 5 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | Titan | 2 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Titan | 534 | 0.22 | 13 min |
| #2 | gp | 490 | 0.32 | 13 min |
| #3 | FEE | 240 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gp | +1.29 | 85 | 68 |
| #2 | Titan | +0.97 | 59 | 57 |
| #3 | FEE | +0.50 | 60 | 64 |
| #4 | ηicky | -0.37 | 63 | 62 |





