










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 157 matches | ||
| Wingman | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 28 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2088 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,090 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1118 | 18% |
| Smokes | 1754 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1688 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1530 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $718,518 of utility $165 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 33 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KeK | 57% | 42 |
| #2 | buh | 56% | 34 |
| #3 | vakoo- | 45% | 11 |
| #4 | maucticka | 45% | 91 |
| #5 | k | 44% | 70 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | buh | 56% | 34 |
| #3 | vakoo- | 45% | 11 |
| #4 | maucticka | 45% | 91 |
| #5 | k | 44% | 70 |
| #6 | ejdelkaa | 43% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | maucticka | 21 | 0.0113 |
| #2 | vakoo- | 5 | 0.0218 |
| #3 | KeK | 4 | 0.0046 |
| #4 | buh | 3 | 0.0043 |
| #5 | ejdelkaa | 2 | 0.0067 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | maucticka | 141 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #2 | KeK | 109 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #3 | buh | 109 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #4 | vakoo- | 52 | 0.23 | 1 min |
| #5 | ejdelkaa | 32 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vakoo- | +3.28 | 76 | 63 |
| #2 | _Alex_ | +2.18 | 78 | 48 |
| #3 | KeK | +1.51 | 71 | 52 |
| #4 | maucticka | -0.67 | 42 | 40 |
| #5 | ejdelkaa | -2.49 | 47 | 65 |





