








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 19 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 17 matches | ||
| Premier | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
353 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 944 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 131 | 14% |
| Smokes | 256 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 319 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 238 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $129,466 of utility $157 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 11 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | The Experienced Crypto Dev.cs2 | 75% | 4 |
| #2 | Minsky | 67% | 3 |
| #3 | Nuuttor | 67% | 3 |
| #4 | RiCH AND POOR | 60% | 5 |
| #5 | Jarkko | 57% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jarkko | 79 | 0.26 | 2 min |
| #2 | imN3O | 30 | 0.25 | 1 min |
| #3 | Minsky | 17 | 0.24 | 1 min |
| #4 | AI0405T | 15 | 0.37 | 0 min |
| #5 | Janbe | 13 | 0.33 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zeikkiz | +6.43 | 78 | 73 |
| #2 | Janbe | +6.27 | 64 | 76 |
| #3 | ankka | +4.61 | 96 | 49 |
| #4 | imN3O | +4.41 | 93 | 56 |
| #5 | The Experienced Crypto Dev.cs2 | +3.92 | 69 | 61 |





