








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 430 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 87 matches | ||
| Premier | 74 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




30 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3761 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,496 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3315 | 32% |
| Smokes | 2176 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 2510 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2495 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $749,966 of utility $106 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 726 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sid | 61% | 74 |
| #2 | -M | 50% | 24 |
| #3 | sonorahh | 48% | 71 |
| #4 | Beast | 38% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sid | 61% | 74 |
| #2 | -M | 50% | 24 |
| #3 | sonorahh | 48% | 71 |
| #4 | Beast | 38% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sonorahh | 7 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | Sid | 3 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | Beast | 1 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sid | 162 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #2 | sonorahh | 140 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #3 | Beast | 66 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #4 | -M | 45 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flaaars | +2.90 | 84 | 61 |
| #2 | Beast | +1.69 | 89 | 65 |
| #3 | Sid | -0.48 | 73 | 69 |
| #4 | -M | -2.26 | 48 | 58 |
| #5 | sonorahh | -3.93 | 11 | 62 |





