








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 799 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 187 matches | ||
| Faceit | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




47 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3194 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,648 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2312 | 24% |
| Smokes | 2605 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2166 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 2565 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,067,470 of utility $189 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 543 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | El Saugo69 | 59% | 41 |
| #2 | Horst Lüning | 54% | 81 |
| #3 | nick | 53% | 146 |
| #4 | Drumslayer420 | 31% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | El Saugo69 | 59% | 41 |
| #2 | Horst Lüning | 54% | 81 |
| #3 | nick | 53% | 146 |
| #4 | Drumslayer420 | 31% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nick | 25 | 0.0083 |
| #2 | Horst Lüning | 13 | 0.0077 |
| #3 | El Saugo69 | 4 | 0.0047 |
| #4 | Drumslayer420 | 2 | 0.0062 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nick | 502 | 0.17 | 15 min |
| #2 | Horst Lüning | 253 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #3 | El Saugo69 | 147 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| #4 | Drumslayer420 | 17 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | catfishv1- | +1.94 | 75 | 69 |
| #2 | nick | +1.03 | 68 | 70 |
| #3 | Horst Lüning | -0.41 | 74 | 47 |
| #4 | Drumslayer420 | -2.97 | 64 | 48 |
| #5 | El Saugo69 | -3.91 | 44 | 58 |





