








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 503 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 92 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 49 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1157 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,446 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 975 | 18% |
| Smokes | 1979 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 1303 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1189 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $413,281 of utility $122 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 440 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SMoky | 70% | 10 |
| #2 | Popo Lom Lom | 51% | 57 |
| #3 | [pG] eddy PISTOLERO | 48% | 25 |
| #4 | VENOM | 48% | 23 |
| #5 | aK!ra アキラ | 44% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Popo Lom Lom | 122 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #2 | [pG] eddy PISTOLERO | 82 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #3 | aK!ra アキラ | 62 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | VENOM | 49 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #5 | SMoky | 44 | 0.24 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SMoky | +4.07 | 47 | 77 |
| #2 | [pG] eddy PISTOLERO | +1.33 | 52 | 67 |
| #3 | 50BigTasty | +1.20 | 48 | 56 |
| #4 | friggen | +0.77 | 46 | 33 |
| #5 | Popo Lom Lom | +0.60 | 42 | 54 |





