








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 4 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 23 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
724 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 441 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 100 | 23% |
| Smokes | 104 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 119 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 118 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $238,005 of utility $197 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DMODeejay | 70% | 10 |
| #2 | Horatio | 63% | 8 |
| #3 | yeunn | 59% | 17 |
| #4 | 27 days 27 nights | 57% | 37 |
| #5 | Meekz Manny | 56% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yeunn | 5 | 0.0182 |
| #2 | 27 days 27 nights | 4 | 0.0060 |
| #3 | Meekz Manny | 2 | 0.0056 |
| #4 | DMODeejay | 2 | 0.0101 |
| #5 | Horatio | 2 | 0.0127 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 27 days 27 nights | 27 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #2 | yeunn | 21 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| #3 | DMODeejay | 7 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #4 | Meekz Manny | 4 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| #5 | Horatio | 3 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yeunn | +6.45 | 99 | 60 |
| #2 | Meekz Manny | +3.43 | 99 | 41 |
| #3 | DMODeejay | +3.36 | 98 | 36 |
| #4 | Horatio | +1.93 | 60 | 22 |
| #5 | smol | +1.46 | 97 | 35 |





