










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 310 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 81 matches | ||
| Premier | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Faceit | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 42 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1429 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,647 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1831 | 39% |
| Smokes | 753 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 969 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1094 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $545,186 of utility $172 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1462 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Anuslilly | 45% | 60 |
| #2 | Happy | 37% | 62 |
| #3 | Bang Boom | 33% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Anuslilly | 45% | 60 |
| #2 | Happy | 37% | 62 |
| #3 | Bang Boom | 33% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Anuslilly | 3 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | Bang Boom | 1 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Anuslilly | 23 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| #2 | Happy | 12 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| #3 | Bang Boom | 10 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Anuslilly | +1.27 | 70 | 41 |
| #2 | Nobbe | -0.15 | 76 | 61 |
| #3 | Bang Boom | -0.51 | 73 | 44 |
| #4 | Happy | -2.51 | 46 | 33 |





