








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1875 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 305 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 154 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 118 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 113 matches | ||
| Premier | 90 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 76 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




76 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6824 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 30,830 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6236 | 20% |
| Smokes | 8407 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 11278 | 37% |
| Molotovs | 4909 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,275,450 of utility $162 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3135 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Marty McFly | 56% | 116 |
| #2 | Culture ✪ | 54% | 191 |
| #3 | Steve | 47% | 177 |
| #4 | Nugget Is Kewl | 47% | 195 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Marty McFly | 56% | 116 |
| #2 | Culture ✪ | 54% | 191 |
| #3 | Steve | 47% | 177 |
| #4 | Nugget Is Kewl | 47% | 195 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Culture ✪ | 36 | 0.0098 |
| #2 | Nugget Is Kewl | 31 | 0.0081 |
| #3 | Steve | 27 | 0.0078 |
| #4 | Marty McFly | 12 | 0.0054 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Culture ✪ | 614 | 0.17 | 14 min |
| #2 | Nugget Is Kewl | 530 | 0.14 | 10 min |
| #3 | Steve | 517 | 0.15 | 10 min |
| #4 | Marty McFly | 432 | 0.19 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Marty McFly | +5.44 | 80 | 50 |
| #2 | Culture ✪ | +3.02 | 78 | 55 |
| #3 | Steve | +0.43 | 33 | 41 |
| #4 | Nugget Is Kewl | +0.31 | 68 | 44 |
| #5 | reap | -1.94 | 49 | 65 |





