










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 251 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 168 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 37 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1933 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,073 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1675 | 33% |
| Smokes | 906 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 1448 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1044 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $703,543 of utility $178 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 106 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Armenianđź‘‘ | 54% | 13 |
| #2 | Mr. Pakiii | 50% | 12 |
| #3 | Sky Power | 41% | 46 |
| #4 | Mariodes | 40% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Armenianđź‘‘ | 54% | 13 |
| #2 | Mr. Pakiii | 50% | 12 |
| #3 | Sky Power | 41% | 46 |
| #4 | Mariodes | 40% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mariodes | 8 | 0.0076 |
| #2 | Mr. Pakiii | 2 | 0.0082 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sky Power | 70 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #2 | Mariodes | 69 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #3 | Armenianđź‘‘ | 19 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| #4 | Mr. Pakiii | 19 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kruse! | +1.78 | 70 | 58 |
| #2 | Mariodes | -0.42 | 42 | 55 |
| #3 | Sky Power | -1.71 | 37 | 51 |
| #4 | Armenianđź‘‘ | -2.59 | 41 | 47 |
| #5 | Mr. Pakiii | -3.35 | 27 | 33 |





