








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 18 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 5 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
65 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 238 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 43 | 18% |
| Smokes | 63 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 70 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 62 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $8,183 of utility $105 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 18 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Bässö | 33% | 3 |
| #3 | Normi äijä | 33% | 6 |
| #4 | Horst Schimanski | 0% | 2 |
| #5 | Älä jaksa | 0% | 4 |
| #6 | Heiniana George Randrianjatovo | 0% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Heiniana George Randrianjatovo | 11 | 0.14 | 0 min |
| #2 | Älä jaksa | 10 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| #3 | Normi äijä | 8 | 0.21 | 0 min |
| #4 | Horst Schimanski | 2 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Normi äijä | +3.64 | 46 | 42 |
| #2 | Heiniana George Randrianjatovo | +0.12 | 72 | 46 |
| #3 | Älä jaksa | +0.08 | 67 | 57 |
| #4 | Vanha äijä | -0.19 | 32 | 53 |
| #5 | Bässö | -0.66 | 47 | 64 |





