








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 99 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 78 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 45 matches | ||
| Premier | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2127 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,385 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1842 | 29% |
| Smokes | 1046 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 2182 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 1315 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $342,554 of utility $81 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 63 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ap3x Preda0r | 64% | 11 |
| #2 | J | 56% | 16 |
| #3 | Timmy | 51% | 55 |
| #4 | Nicksbrother | 33% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ap3x Preda0r | 64% | 11 |
| #2 | J | 56% | 16 |
| #3 | Timmy | 51% | 55 |
| #4 | Nicksbrother | 33% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Timmy | 20 | 0.0175 |
| #2 | J | 2 | 0.0060 |
| #3 | Ap3x Preda0r | 1 | 0.0043 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Timmy | 218 | 0.19 | 6 min |
| #2 | Nicksbrother | 23 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #3 | Ap3x Preda0r | 16 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| #4 | J | 12 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Timmy | +3.33 | 90 | 63 |
| #2 | Blur | +1.58 | 79 | 69 |
| #3 | J | -0.09 | 81 | 49 |
| #4 | Ap3x Preda0r | -0.23 | 60 | 52 |
| #5 | Nicksbrother | -0.75 | 66 | 64 |





