










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 145 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 34 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1773 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,323 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1046 | 20% |
| Smokes | 1374 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1730 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 1173 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $483,571 of utility $120 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 445 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zairkaabogoss | 50% | 30 |
| #2 | McCouille | 50% | 42 |
| #3 | Spokeezy | 50% | 44 |
| #4 | DEVILS_K | 47% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zairkaabogoss | 50% | 30 |
| #2 | McCouille | 50% | 42 |
| #3 | Spokeezy | 50% | 44 |
| #4 | DEVILS_K | 47% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zairkaabogoss | 10 | 0.0158 |
| #2 | McCouille | 5 | 0.0057 |
| #3 | Spokeezy | 3 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | DEVILS_K | 2 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | McCouille | 201 | 0.23 | 6 min |
| #2 | DEVILS_K | 190 | 0.27 | 6 min |
| #3 | Zairkaabogoss | 93 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #4 | Spokeezy | 79 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zairkaabogoss | +2.43 | 79 | 44 |
| #2 | Marco | +0.70 | 71 | 55 |
| #3 | McCouille | +0.13 | 68 | 66 |
| #4 | DEVILS_K | -0.90 | 62 | 66 |
| #5 | Spokeezy | -1.24 | 66 | 50 |





