








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 248 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 96 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Renown | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1752 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,342 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 829 | 25% |
| Smokes | 899 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1150 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 464 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $516,095 of utility $150 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 419 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | prosanini(∩'-´)⊃*:・゚✧ | 55% | 53 |
| #2 | Moyo | 53% | 45 |
| #3 | kermin666 | 53% | 91 |
| #4 | murxnn | 50% | 28 |
| #5 | Tempest | 38% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | prosanini(∩'-´)⊃*:・゚✧ | 55% | 53 |
| #2 | Moyo | 53% | 45 |
| #3 | kermin666 | 53% | 91 |
| #4 | murxnn | 50% | 28 |
| #5 | Tempest | 38% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kermin666 | 7 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | prosanini(∩'-´)⊃*:・゚✧ | 2 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | murxnn | 2 | 0.0033 |
| #4 | Moyo | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kermin666 | 184 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #2 | prosanini(∩'-´)⊃*:・゚✧ | 123 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #3 | Tempest | 47 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| #4 | Moyo | 32 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #5 | murxnn | 20 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vMio | +2.76 | 85 | 41 |
| #2 | Tempest | +1.27 | 71 | 58 |
| #3 | kermin666 | +0.19 | 83 | 62 |
| #4 | prosanini(∩'-´)⊃*:・゚✧ | -0.51 | 69 | 56 |
| #5 | murxnn | -0.60 | 67 | 45 |





