








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 8 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 87 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
900 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,797 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1704 | 36% |
| Smokes | 1045 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 1270 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 778 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $63,343 of utility $24 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 9 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jijon | 53% | 38 |
| #2 | LC | 46% | 13 |
| #3 | Kijon | 42% | 50 |
| #4 | johan | 33% | 9 |
| #5 | Eijon | 27% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | LC | 46% | 13 |
| #3 | Kijon | 42% | 50 |
| #4 | johan | 33% | 9 |
| #5 | Eijon | 27% | 11 |
| #6 | Just2EZ | 22% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kijon | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #2 | Jijon | 1 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | LC | 1 | 0.0036 |
| #4 | Eijon | 1 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jijon | 139 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| #2 | Kijon | 63 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #3 | Eijon | 29 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #4 | LC | 17 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| #5 | johan | 16 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Just2EZ | +8.67 | 82 | 49 |
| #2 | johan | +2.21 | 83 | 59 |
| #3 | LC | +0.54 | 60 | 53 |
| #4 | Stin2IS | -0.11 | 46 | 65 |
| #5 | Jijon | -1.25 | 40 | 56 |





