








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1550 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 171 matches | ||
| Wingman | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2625 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,729 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 995 | 21% |
| Smokes | 1075 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1062 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1597 | 34% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,148,407 of utility $218 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 349 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MoOveOut | 71% | 24 |
| #2 | King Bob | 68% | 25 |
| #3 | Edgy Jejy | 53% | 19 |
| #4 | zelo | 52% | 23 |
| #5 | Raynig | 47% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Schnulpi | +2.59 | 85 | 49 |
| #2 | Edgy Jejy | +2.22 | 78 | 27 |
| #3 | King Bob | +1.39 | 48 | 67 |
| #4 | watchmanツ | +1.28 | 67 | 72 |
| #5 | MoOveOut | +0.88 | 75 | 68 |





