








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1663 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 121 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 81 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 9 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 5 matches | ||
| Esplay | 1 match | 2,010 | |
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 40 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




37 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7025 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,155 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6198 | 31% |
| Smokes | 4243 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 4282 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 5432 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,605,684 of utility $126 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 817 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | svzki | 66% | 35 |
| #4 | #FiN Larttu_ | 62% | 95 |
| #5 | topi' | 62% | 47 |
| #6 | EME | 60% | 58 |
| #7 | Aare ✈💥 2 | 57% | 277 |





