








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 280 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 217 matches | ||
| Faceit | 62 matches | ||
| Wingman | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




31 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3567 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,918 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6502 | 38% |
| Smokes | 4074 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 2637 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 3705 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $547,689 of utility $71 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 292 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Josh | 56% | 70 |
| #2 | ChopChop | 52% | 276 |
| #3 | Impact | 50% | 315 |
| #4 | Focus834 | 48% | 152 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Josh | 56% | 70 |
| #2 | ChopChop | 52% | 276 |
| #3 | Impact | 50% | 315 |
| #4 | Focus834 | 48% | 152 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Focus834 | 10 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | Impact | 9 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | ChopChop | 9 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | Josh | 3 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Impact | 915 | 0.14 | 24 min |
| #2 | Focus834 | 757 | 0.24 | 21 min |
| #3 | ChopChop | 558 | 0.10 | 14 min |
| #4 | Josh | 103 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cyber | +1.51 | 88 | 72 |
| #2 | ChopChop | +0.34 | 70 | 58 |
| #3 | Impact | +0.04 | 78 | 61 |
| #4 | Focus834 | -0.67 | 68 | 65 |
| #5 | Josh | -2.25 | 59 | 70 |





