








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 642 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 411 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 107 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




50 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5042 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,827 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5178 | 33% |
| Smokes | 4625 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 3803 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2221 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,200,734 of utility $120 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1140 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | adibadi | 57% | 68 |
| #2 | quiz | 56% | 48 |
| #3 | Snjókaddl | 54% | 39 |
| #4 | Thomsey | 53% | 235 |
| #5 | 127 | 53% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Thomsey | 53% | 235 |
| #5 | 127 | 53% | 38 |
| #6 | flufff | 52% | 111 |
| #7 | Cruz@ | 49% | 237 |
| #8 | Bruza | 46% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Thomsey | 39 | 0.0078 |
| #2 | Cruz@ | 10 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | flufff | 8 | 0.0033 |
| #4 | 127 | 4 | 0.0048 |
| #5 | Bruza | 4 | 0.0049 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | flufff | 394 | 0.16 | 11 min |
| #2 | Thomsey | 358 | 0.07 | 8 min |
| #3 | Cruz@ | 314 | 0.06 | 8 min |
| #4 | adibadi | 245 | 0.17 | 7 min |
| #5 | 127 | 156 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Matt | +1.64 | 78 | 63 |
| #2 | flufff | +1.34 | 86 | 70 |
| #3 | 127 | +0.41 | 80 | 69 |
| #4 | adibadi | +0.28 | 77 | 66 |
| #5 | Cruz@ | +0.25 | 77 | 63 |





