








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 88 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 11 matches | ||
| Faceit | 11 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
421 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,450 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 661 | 46% |
| Smokes | 393 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 286 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 110 | 8% |
Our logs show you have wasted $116,500 of utility $129 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 175 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GJRDNG | 67% | 3 |
| #2 | Syphyx #Never4Get | 58% | 12 |
| #3 | no1re | 33% | 6 |
| #4 | m0rgaN | 20% | 5 |
| #5 | MYTRAIDMARK™ | 0% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GJRDNG | 67% | 3 |
| #2 | Syphyx #Never4Get | 58% | 12 |
| #3 | no1re | 33% | 6 |
| #4 | m0rgaN | 20% | 5 |
| #5 | MYTRAIDMARK™ | 0% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Syphyx #Never4Get | 3 | 0.0129 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | m0rgaN | 45 | 0.38 | 1 min |
| #2 | Syphyx #Never4Get | 37 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #3 | no1re | 25 | 0.18 | 0 min |
| #4 | MYTRAIDMARK™ | 13 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| #5 | GJRDNG | 7 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | no1re | +3.33 | 86 | 64 |
| #2 | GJRDNG | +2.30 | 87 | 50 |
| #3 | Syphyx #Never4Get | +0.19 | 71 | 58 |
| #4 | Le Beeef | -0.23 | 65 | 58 |
| #5 | m0rgaN | -0.48 | 68 | 56 |





