








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 813 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 299 matches | ||
| Faceit | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4115 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,105 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3421 | 24% |
| Smokes | 3720 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 3213 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 3751 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,119,472 of utility $130 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 436 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ToasTâ„¢ | 58% | 26 |
| #2 | seabass | 55% | 47 |
| #3 | The_HaZarddd.ttv | 49% | 41 |
| #4 | Vye | 40% | 58 |
| #5 | Rabbitt | 38% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ToasTâ„¢ | 58% | 26 |
| #2 | seabass | 55% | 47 |
| #3 | The_HaZarddd.ttv | 49% | 41 |
| #4 | Vye | 40% | 58 |
| #5 | Rabbitt | 38% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vye | 2 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | seabass | 2 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | The_HaZarddd.ttv | 2 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | Rabbitt | 1 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | seabass | 329 | 0.31 | 10 min |
| #2 | Vye | 197 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #3 | Rabbitt | 177 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| #4 | The_HaZarddd.ttv | 125 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #5 | ToasTâ„¢ | 20 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vye | +0.75 | 72 | 66 |
| #2 | ToasTâ„¢ | +0.59 | 69 | 47 |
| #3 | The_HaZarddd.ttv | +0.43 | 84 | 69 |
| #4 | seabass | +0.42 | 65 | 71 |
| #5 | Nine | +0.28 | 77 | 64 |





