








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 61 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
524 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,120 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 211 | 19% |
| Smokes | 184 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 454 | 41% |
| Molotovs | 271 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $119,346 of utility $80 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 26 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zurus | 75% | 4 |
| #2 | Cloud | 59% | 22 |
| #3 | Thomas | 53% | 17 |
| #4 | Cakes | 50% | 14 |
| #5 | ZywOo | 20% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Cloud | 59% | 22 |
| #3 | Thomas | 53% | 17 |
| #4 | Cakes | 50% | 14 |
| #5 | ZywOo | 20% | 5 |
| #6 | Lazi | 20% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cloud | 1 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | Thomas | 1 | 0.0030 |
| #3 | ZywOo | 1 | 0.0093 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Thomas | 19 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #2 | Cloud | 17 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #3 | ZywOo | 17 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #4 | Cakes | 14 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| #5 | Zurus | 9 | 0.12 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Thomas | +7.30 | 75 | 62 |
| #2 | Cakes | +4.52 | 62 | 49 |
| #3 | Zurus | -0.45 | 33 | 46 |
| #4 | DennisTheAmazingCow | -0.68 | 34 | 46 |
| #5 | Cloud | -2.78 | 42 | 27 |





