








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Premier | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 6 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
100 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 412 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 114 | 28% |
| Smokes | 91 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 110 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 97 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $31,850 of utility $133 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 12 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♔ Oneclick Göran | 57% | 7 |
| #2 | fruktsallad- | 50% | 4 |
| #3 | z0kie- Blame it on the Disco | 50% | 4 |
| #4 | SALVATORE | 50% | 12 |
| #5 | Mikhail Plz | 0% | 2 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♔ Oneclick Göran | 57% | 7 |
| #2 | fruktsallad- | 50% | 4 |
| #3 | z0kie- Blame it on the Disco | 50% | 4 |
| #4 | SALVATORE | 50% | 12 |
| #5 | Mikhail Plz | 0% | 2 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♔ Oneclick Göran | 2 | 0.0153 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SALVATORE | 27 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| #2 | z0kie- Blame it on the Disco | 24 | 0.25 | 1 min |
| #3 | ♔ Oneclick Göran | 10 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| #4 | fruktsallad- | 8 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| #5 | Mikhail Plz | 7 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | z0kie- Blame it on the Disco | +4.64 | 70 | 80 |
| #2 | SALVATORE | +2.81 | 63 | 67 |
| #3 | Mikhail Plz | +1.79 | 66 | 72 |
| #4 | MagikerN | +0.39 | 55 | 60 |
| #5 | fruktsallad- | -0.74 | 47 | 65 |





