








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 75 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 6 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 5 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
93 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 238 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 37 | 16% |
| Smokes | 71 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 60 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 70 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $76,444 of utility $300 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 23 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | i live in norrland | 82% | 11 |
| #2 | Splokfake | 78% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | i live in norrland | 82% | 11 |
| #2 | Splokfake | 78% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | i live in norrland | 1 | 0.0046 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | i live in norrland | 24 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #2 | Splokfake | 1 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | i live in norrland | +5.16 | 88 | 62 |
| #2 | GuarN | -1.51 | 78 | 43 |
| #3 | Splokfake | -3.70 | 52 | 25 |





