








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1600 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 300 matches | ||
| Faceit | 48 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 48 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3063 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,859 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5872 | 42% |
| Smokes | 4740 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 882 | 6% |
| Molotovs | 2365 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $783,694 of utility $102 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 967 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RARA | 59% | 94 |
| #2 | lil noose noose | 57% | 179 |
| #3 | p1pagao | 50% | 22 |
| #4 | Misery | 47% | 47 |
| #5 | Ryōiki Tenkai | 43% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RARA | 59% | 94 |
| #2 | lil noose noose | 57% | 179 |
| #3 | p1pagao | 50% | 22 |
| #4 | Misery | 47% | 47 |
| #5 | Ryōiki Tenkai | 43% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lil noose noose | 13 | 0.0033 |
| #2 | Ryōiki Tenkai | 3 | 0.0061 |
| #3 | Misery | 2 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | RARA | 1 | 0.0005 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lil noose noose | 1137 | 0.29 | 25 min |
| #2 | RARA | 196 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #3 | p1pagao | 71 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #4 | Misery | 68 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | Ryōiki Tenkai | 50 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | p1pagao | +3.83 | 81 | 57 |
| #2 | lil noose noose | +1.75 | 69 | 65 |
| #3 | prat prat a | +0.56 | 59 | 59 |
| #4 | Misery | -0.90 | 75 | 55 |
| #5 | RARA | -1.02 | 45 | 66 |





