








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1343 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 437 matches | ||
| Wingman | 77 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 30 matches | ||
| Faceit | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 22 different maps





Our logs show 67 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




47 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5815 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,441 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4987 | 29% |
| Smokes | 3419 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 5260 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 3775 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,847,735 of utility $207 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 616 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | casper SWE (weedbay) | 56% | 146 |
| #2 | 𝙈 𝘼 𝙉 𝙆 | 55% | 99 |
| #3 | jkuyko | 54% | 287 |
| #4 | jurp | 54% | 141 |
| #5 | jorkke | 53% | 147 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ralffi Lauren | 931 | 0.24 | 23 min |
| #2 | jkuyko | 638 | 0.11 | 15 min |
| #3 | jurp | 422 | 0.14 | 12 min |
| #4 | later alligator | 354 | 0.13 | 10 min |
| #5 | 𝙈 𝘼 𝙉 𝙆 | 304 | 0.14 | 10 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | casper SWE (weedbay) | +2.73 | 84 | 68 |
| #2 | jkuyko | +1.10 | 80 | 65 |
| #3 | körssiö CAMEL | +0.69 | 84 | 60 |
| #4 | lexi | +0.63 | 77 | 59 |
| #5 | jurp | +0.19 | 72 | 75 |





