








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 148 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 247 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Esplay | 1 match | 1,554 | |
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3302 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,596 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2969 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2983 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2216 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2428 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $626,425 of utility $87 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 85 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | William | 67% | 30 |
| #2 | Snoken | 52% | 286 |
| #3 | Hoffis | 45% | 151 |
| #4 | Dunder | 44% | 61 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | William | 67% | 30 |
| #2 | Snoken | 52% | 286 |
| #3 | Hoffis | 45% | 151 |
| #4 | Dunder | 44% | 61 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Snoken | 16 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | Hoffis | 6 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | William | 4 | 0.0066 |
| #4 | Dunder | 2 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Snoken | 976 | 0.17 | 26 min |
| #2 | William | 103 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #3 | Hoffis | 54 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #4 | Dunder | 48 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Snoken | +2.42 | 64 | 59 |
| #2 | William | +1.51 | 73 | 48 |
| #3 | ☆𝒌1𝒖𝒎𝒑𝒆☆ | +0.77 | 67 | 61 |
| #4 | Dunder | -0.77 | 63 | 46 |
| #5 | Hoffis | -4.91 | 23 | 20 |





