








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 61 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 105 matches | ||
| Premier | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1754 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,828 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1488 | 31% |
| Smokes | 1245 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 935 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 1160 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $285,344 of utility $98 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 150 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Smiley | 73% | 11 |
| #2 | Ose | 57% | 28 |
| #3 | Henkkuli | 55% | 82 |
| #4 | Jere | 47% | 60 |
| #5 | vili | 42% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Henkkuli | 55% | 82 |
| #4 | Jere | 47% | 60 |
| #5 | vili | 42% | 31 |
| #6 | kAz | 40% | 10 |
| #7 | Pasi | 29% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vili | 5 | 0.0075 |
| #2 | kAz | 2 | 0.0087 |
| #3 | Jere | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Henkkuli | 179 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #2 | vili | 110 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #3 | Jere | 89 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #4 | Smiley | 68 | 0.28 | 2 min |
| #5 | Pasi | 42 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Smiley | +2.07 | 68 | 69 |
| #2 | Zuko | +0.74 | 81 | 61 |
| #3 | Jere | +0.63 | 72 | 57 |
| #4 | Henkkuli | +0.56 | 81 | 67 |
| #5 | Ose | +0.26 | 67 | 47 |





