








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 243 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 61 matches | ||
| Faceit | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1260 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,966 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2396 | 40% |
| Smokes | 1473 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 820 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 1277 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $274,845 of utility $96 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 156 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MiNG ^o^ | 57% | 61 |
| #2 | masfats | 57% | 95 |
| #3 | Gurtz | 57% | 53 |
| #4 | awful | 56% | 90 |
| #5 | blood | 54% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | masfats | 5 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | MiNG ^o^ | 5 | 0.0039 |
| #3 | Gurtz | 5 | 0.0043 |
| #4 | awful | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #5 | Reaper | 1 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | masfats | 498 | 0.24 | 16 min |
| #2 | awful | 478 | 0.25 | 14 min |
| #3 | Gurtz | 224 | 0.19 | 6 min |
| #4 | MiNG ^o^ | 216 | 0.17 | 7 min |
| #5 | Reaper | 155 | 0.26 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Reaper | +3.85 | 92 | 63 |
| #2 | blood | +1.40 | 87 | 45 |
| #3 | twitch.tv/savir454 | +0.89 | 74 | 69 |
| #4 | Gurtz | +0.65 | 76 | 60 |
| #5 | awful | +0.55 | 68 | 68 |





