








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 185 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 246 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 19 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3344 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,037 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3526 | 29% |
| Smokes | 2381 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 3733 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 2397 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,008,805 of utility $129 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 197 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mixy Singer | 82% | 22 |
| #2 | DEV Michael | 67% | 45 |
| #3 | T4USEND | 56% | 32 |
| #4 | Bern1 betäubt seine Sinne ♿ | 51% | 102 |
| #5 | vielleicht | 49% | 296 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mixy Singer | 82% | 22 |
| #2 | DEV Michael | 67% | 45 |
| #3 | T4USEND | 56% | 32 |
| #4 | Bern1 betäubt seine Sinne ♿ | 51% | 102 |
| #5 | vielleicht | 49% | 296 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vielleicht | 11 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | DEV Michael | 7 | 0.0076 |
| #3 | Mixy Singer | 3 | 0.0066 |
| #4 | Bern1 betäubt seine Sinne ♿ | 2 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | T4USEND | 1 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vielleicht | 988 | 0.16 | 28 min |
| #2 | Bern1 betäubt seine Sinne ♿ | 200 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #3 | DEV Michael | 123 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #4 | Mixy Singer | 25 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| #5 | T4USEND | 17 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mixy Singer | +2.50 | 61 | 58 |
| #2 | Kingly | +0.81 | 47 | 61 |
| #3 | T4USEND | +0.69 | 57 | 54 |
| #4 | DEV Michael | -0.06 | 41 | 70 |
| #5 | Bern1 betäubt seine Sinne ♿ | -0.94 | 53 | 72 |





