








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 137 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 88 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




44 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1175 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,300 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1969 | 37% |
| Smokes | 918 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 1236 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1177 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $365,348 of utility $122 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 647 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fug | 67% | 12 |
| #2 | Nern | 65% | 34 |
| #3 | liFeRepeR24 | 57% | 28 |
| #4 | Pumpkin | 57% | 37 |
| #5 | Petey Pablo | 56% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fluuubbuuugguuusted jeruuume | 31 | 0.0170 |
| #2 | liFeRepeR24 | 21 | 0.0366 |
| #3 | Pumpkin | 7 | 0.0093 |
| #4 | Tentin® (It goes Yah) | 3 | 0.0058 |
| #5 | Petey Pablo | 3 | 0.0159 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | liFeRepeR24 | 206 | 0.36 | 3 min |
| #2 | fluuubbuuugguuusted jeruuume | 195 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #3 | Pumpkin | 111 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #4 | Nern | 42 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | Fug | 41 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | liFeRepeR24 | +3.80 | 59 | 51 |
| #2 | Fug | +2.53 | 59 | 61 |
| #3 | Pumpkin | +2.22 | 75 | 53 |
| #4 | Petey Pablo | +1.07 | 43 | 21 |
| #5 | fluuubbuuugguuusted jeruuume | +0.96 | 45 | 27 |





