








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 150 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 42 matches | ||
| Premier | 26 matches | ||
| Faceit | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1365 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,260 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 730 | 22% |
| Smokes | 739 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1018 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 773 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $561,721 of utility $154 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 24 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | schizophrenic gamer | 75% | 12 |
| #2 | Dolphin | 60% | 68 |
| #3 | Duzel | 55% | 128 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | schizophrenic gamer | 75% | 12 |
| #2 | Dolphin | 60% | 68 |
| #3 | Duzel | 55% | 128 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dolphin | 3 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | schizophrenic gamer | 2 | 0.0087 |
| #3 | Duzel | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Duzel | 208 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #2 | Dolphin | 124 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #3 | schizophrenic gamer | 20 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | schizophrenic gamer | +4.45 | 83 | 26 |
| #2 | Dolphin | +2.19 | 88 | 61 |
| #3 | Duzel | +1.94 | 76 | 51 |
| #4 | Kane | -0.53 | 69 | 46 |





