








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1445 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 599 matches | ||
| Wingman | 85 matches | ||
| Faceit | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 121 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




68 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5717 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 33,467 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10513 | 31% |
| Smokes | 8529 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 7923 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 6502 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,816,049 of utility $110 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2290 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SXZ | 57% | 44 |
| #2 | maximus | 55% | 42 |
| #3 | PemiX | 53% | 55 |
| #4 | Lord Jey | 52% | 172 |
| #5 | Tikef | 50% | 175 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Lord Jey | 52% | 172 |
| #5 | Tikef | 50% | 175 |
| #6 | AtLeastITried | 50% | 50 |
| #7 | beno | 49% | 257 |
| #8 | High ping | 47% | 144 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | beno | 35 | 0.0064 |
| #2 | Tikef | 8 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | maximus | 4 | 0.0044 |
| #4 | Lord Jey | 3 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | High ping | 3 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tikef | 625 | 0.17 | 17 min |
| #2 | beno | 530 | 0.10 | 10 min |
| #3 | Lord Jey | 322 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| #4 | High ping | 292 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| #5 | maximus | 166 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | maximus | +3.81 | 78 | 78 |
| #2 | Tikef | +3.75 | 83 | 60 |
| #3 | SXZ | +2.71 | 83 | 66 |
| #4 | beno | +1.71 | 76 | 65 |
| #5 | High ping | +0.96 | 74 | 68 |





