








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1243 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 134 matches | ||
| Premier | 90 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 72 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 33 matches | ||
| Wingman | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 53 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




173 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7273 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,106 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7975 | 42% |
| Smokes | 4189 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 3356 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 3586 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,407,375 of utility $121 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1349 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Divine Intervention | 86% | 35 |
| #2 | thumbger | 82% | 34 |
| #3 | donut | 81% | 54 |
| #4 | alwaysbetonhub | 76% | 37 |
| #5 | Adam | 65% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | muksaw | +4.84 | 86 | 61 |
| #2 | donut | +2.96 | 90 | 59 |
| #3 | WEASELLLLLLL | +2.80 | 85 | 54 |
| #4 | Adam | +2.34 | 75 | 55 |
| #5 | NesdogJr. | +1.47 | 66 | 70 |





