








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 121 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
162 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 797 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 401 | 50% |
| Smokes | 109 | 14% |
| HE Grenades | 197 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 90 | 11% |
Our logs show you have wasted $98,337 of utility $144 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 22 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KillaaGorillaa | 100% | 3 |
| #2 | Flaco | 75% | 12 |
| #3 | w0nder | 67% | 3 |
| #4 | camlarx | 50% | 2 |
| #5 | Tramp | 48% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | camlarx | 50% | 2 |
| #5 | Tramp | 48% | 25 |
| #6 | • Slappy • | 40% | 20 |
| #7 | Shaka | 33% | 3 |
| #8 | slayyy | 23% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flaco | 2 | 0.0086 |
| #2 | Tramp | 1 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | KillaaGorillaa | 1 | 0.0172 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | • Slappy • | 58 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #2 | Tramp | 55 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #3 | slayyy | 27 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #4 | Flaco | 16 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| #5 | camlarx | 10 | 0.29 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tramp | +3.76 | 66 | 46 |
| #2 | w0nder | +2.73 | 73 | 49 |
| #3 | • Slappy • | +2.62 | 46 | 54 |
| #4 | slayyy | +2.49 | 81 | 51 |
| #5 | camlarx | +0.94 | 81 | 65 |





