








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 376 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 186 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




40 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2277 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,844 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2642 | 34% |
| Smokes | 1225 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 1424 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2553 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $839,047 of utility $113 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 984 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ari | 52% | 94 |
| #2 | Gimli | 52% | 163 |
| #3 | SpongeBall | 48% | 29 |
| #4 | DerJeans | 46% | 26 |
| #5 | Chelly02 ♡ | 46% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Chelly02 ♡ | 46% | 24 |
| #6 | Orange Bucket Hat | 44% | 34 |
| #7 | THE DUDE | 43% | 28 |
| #8 | KennyS th Autistic Awper | 41% | 32 |
| #9 | ETH4N0909 ✌ | 37% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ari | 29 | 0.0165 |
| #2 | Gimli | 24 | 0.0071 |
| #3 | KennyS th Autistic Awper | 14 | 0.0208 |
| #4 | Orange Bucket Hat | 7 | 0.0100 |
| #5 | DerJeans | 3 | 0.0053 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gimli | 551 | 0.16 | 15 min |
| #2 | Ari | 186 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #3 | KennyS th Autistic Awper | 163 | 0.24 | 3 min |
| #4 | Orange Bucket Hat | 119 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #5 | THE DUDE | 95 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ari | +11.04 | 96 | 34 |
| #2 | SpongeBall | +2.35 | 42 | 30 |
| #3 | Gimli | +1.04 | 69 | 62 |
| #4 | KennyS th Autistic Awper | +0.71 | 63 | 37 |
| #5 | THE DUDE | +0.04 | 48 | 49 |





