








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 3 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 94 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
483 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,380 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 856 | 62% |
| Smokes | 45 | 3% |
| HE Grenades | 326 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 153 | 11% |
Our logs show you have wasted $96,193 of utility $71 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 18 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ShadowSlayer | 43% | 7 |
| #2 | The Price Master | 43% | 98 |
| #3 | BurmeseManWithAPlan | 33% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ShadowSlayer | 43% | 7 |
| #2 | The Price Master | 43% | 98 |
| #3 | BurmeseManWithAPlan | 33% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ShadowSlayer | 3 | 0.0207 |
| #2 | BurmeseManWithAPlan | 1 | 0.0055 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | The Price Master | 90 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #2 | BurmeseManWithAPlan | 27 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #3 | ShadowSlayer | 17 | 0.12 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | The Price Master | +2.31 | 77 | 67 |
| #2 | ShadowSlayer | -1.78 | 42 | 49 |
| #3 | kriksB | -1.95 | 36 | 48 |
| #4 | BurmeseManWithAPlan | -2.12 | 58 | 47 |





