








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 194 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 407 matches | ||
| Wingman | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4099 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,229 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3805 | 20% |
| Smokes | 5467 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 6231 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 3726 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,531,116 of utility $140 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 49 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♕ Ehris | 49% | 137 |
| #2 | Phoenix | 48% | 273 |
| #3 | Guschtavv | 47% | 448 |
| #4 | Shi | 34% | 47 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♕ Ehris | 49% | 137 |
| #2 | Phoenix | 48% | 273 |
| #3 | Guschtavv | 47% | 448 |
| #4 | Shi | 34% | 47 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Guschtavv | 10 | 0.0011 |
| #2 | Phoenix | 9 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | ♕ Ehris | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | Shi | 2 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Guschtavv | 1118 | 0.12 | 31 min |
| #2 | ♕ Ehris | 318 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #3 | Phoenix | 201 | 0.03 | 5 min |
| #4 | Shi | 121 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♕ Ehris | +1.67 | 69 | 66 |
| #2 | Guschtavv | +0.88 | 58 | 74 |
| #3 | Koles | -0.08 | 48 | 69 |
| #4 | Phoenix | -2.45 | 49 | 45 |
| #5 | Shi | -3.05 | 30 | 45 |





