








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 285 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 140 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 81 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Faceit | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 61 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




34 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4578 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,067 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1998 | 20% |
| Smokes | 3322 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 2713 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2034 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,954,200 of utility $220 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 348 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Profa | 48% | 254 |
| #4 | Mare Krcko | 46% | 214 |
| #5 | kamikazabobi | 43% | 86 |
| #6 | LiMBOO | 42% | 76 |
| #7 | Whovian | 32% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mare Krcko | 14 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | Mystica | 10 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | LiMBOO | 9 | 0.0059 |
| #4 | Profa | 8 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | kamikazabobi | 5 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mare Krcko | 637 | 0.15 | 12 min |
| #2 | Profa | 377 | 0.07 | 9 min |
| #3 | Mystica | 306 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| #4 | LiMBOO | 256 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #5 | kamikazabobi | 131 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | haki | +3.63 | 92 | 41 |
| #2 | Mystica | +0.94 | 64 | 42 |
| #3 | Profa | +0.21 | 49 | 64 |
| #4 | LiMBOO | -2.54 | 49 | 59 |
| #5 | Mare Krcko | -3.96 | 14 | 52 |





