








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 643 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 684 matches | ||
| Faceit | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 32 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




22 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3867 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 35,339 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7182 | 20% |
| Smokes | 10547 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 8760 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 8850 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,465,625 of utility $144 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 319 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | <<🆂🅸🅶🅰>> | 50% | 90 |
| #2 | SweeTyw00w | 45% | 55 |
| #3 | MIKELIKE | 45% | 74 |
| #4 | M1dor1yaKun | 41% | 214 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | <<🆂🅸🅶🅰>> | 50% | 90 |
| #2 | SweeTyw00w | 45% | 55 |
| #3 | MIKELIKE | 45% | 74 |
| #4 | M1dor1yaKun | 41% | 214 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M1dor1yaKun | 11 | 0.0042 |
| #2 | MIKELIKE | 3 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | SweeTyw00w | 2 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | <<🆂🅸🅶🅰>> | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M1dor1yaKun | 121 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #2 | MIKELIKE | 96 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #3 | <<🆂🅸🅶🅰>> | 92 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #4 | SweeTyw00w | 43 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SweeTyw00w | +1.38 | 69 | 58 |
| #2 | <<🆂🅸🅶🅰>> | +0.51 | 47 | 64 |
| #3 | MIKELIKE | +0.18 | 61 | 61 |
| #4 | M1dor1yaKun | +0.07 | 57 | 58 |
| #5 | Fяɛakingout dA-k1nG | -0.28 | 54 | 72 |





