








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 75 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 208 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2587 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,925 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1662 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1405 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 2113 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 745 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $664,027 of utility $116 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 374 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xaimv2 | 63% | 35 |
| #2 | JSquared | 53% | 175 |
| #3 | Dr. Bustdown | 43% | 35 |
| #4 | fluffy stuffles | 41% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xaimv2 | 63% | 35 |
| #2 | JSquared | 53% | 175 |
| #3 | Dr. Bustdown | 43% | 35 |
| #4 | fluffy stuffles | 41% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JSquared | 11 | 0.0030 |
| #2 | xaimv2 | 3 | 0.0040 |
| #3 | fluffy stuffles | 1 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JSquared | 630 | 0.17 | 14 min |
| #2 | Dr. Bustdown | 204 | 0.27 | 4 min |
| #3 | xaimv2 | 159 | 0.21 | 4 min |
| #4 | fluffy stuffles | 92 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xaimv2 | +5.41 | 90 | 73 |
| #2 | Dr. Bustdown | +1.84 | 74 | 55 |
| #3 | enough | +0.02 | 57 | 50 |
| #4 | fluffy stuffles | -0.81 | 68 | 55 |
| #5 | JSquared | -1.89 | 30 | 60 |





